Background

Following a routine mammogram in January, 2009 I was recalled and subsequently diagnosed with a Grade 3 tumour. My first reaction was numbness and the whole issue took some time to sink in. I had had a "Lifescan" some 3 months before which had highlighted a couple of nodules on my lungs. These were thought to be benign and I discounted them at the time. However, coupled with the recent diagnosis and a persistent cough over the Christmas period I became concerned that there may be something more widespread. My feeling at this time was that if this were the case there was little point in puting myself through, what I perceived to be, a horrendous course of treatment.

Everyone said, “One day at a time” and I would pass that advice on. The medical machine jumped into action and I was taken over. I cannot praise the Breast Cancer and Oncology units at the Western General, Edinburgh highly enough. Before I knew it I was taken into hospital to have the offending tumour of some 2 cms. removed along with 4 lymph nodes. Unfortunately the cancer had travelled to one of the lymph nodes and a further operation was required to remove the rest of the lymph nodes under my left arm. This time everything, including my lung concern, was clear and I am now at the starting line of my return journey.

I experienced a roller coaster of emotions during the difficult weeks sampling the whole spectrum at some point along the way. My husband had just retired and I was distraught that, because of me, all our plans for the year had to be scrapped. I have hugely appreciated the support of family and friends but John is the one who is having to travel this road with me and I cannot thank him enough for doing it so willingly. He always knows when a cuddle and pep talk are needed and with his support I just cannot lose.

I notified Cramond Kirk that I would be giving up the delivery of the “Grapevine” for the foreseeable future which very kindly prompted a visit from the Rev. Dr. Russell Barr. As he left, the sun was shining and all the Spring flowers were about to burst forth with the promise of so much life and colour to come. I was pulled along on the coat tails of this theme.

My medical "Plan of Execution" which is personalised to me involves 6 months of chemo; 1 month of radiotherapy administered daily; 1 year of Herceptin administered every 3 weeks and 5 years of pills. This all seems quite daunting so I am breaking the process up into elements that I can get my head around. The first and most difficult bit will be the chemo as I have to get through 8 sessions, one every 3 weeks. The first 4 sessions will, I believe, be the worst as the particular drug used is the one which makes the hair fall out.

My counter plan is to eat sensibly including my "5 a day" and exercise regularly where possible. I also have to recognise my limitations and accept that there will be bad days. I am not going to be downbeat and I apologise in advance if my sense of humour is tedious - it is my way of coping with the situation I find myself in.

From now on it is onwards and upwards! I cannot imagine how the rest of the year will be but the sooner I get started the sooner I will get through it.